WARNING:

This isn’t the same boring, regurgitated, and plagiarized list you’ve seen plastered time and again all over the Internet. This list is intended to motivate you, to inspire you and, like the jury in a Catholic priest’s pedophile trial, to force you to see the error of your ways.

Read at your own risk!

Tip 1:

Get your head in the game. SEO isn’t rocket science, but to be good at it, you’ve got to want to be good at it. And that means you’ve got to put down the Wii, pick up the pace and tell your guild buddies that you won’t be logging in to help slay the dragon or rescue the elves tonight.

The only quest you’re joining for a while is the quest to shovel a heap of unique visitors to your limp, anemic, traffic starved website. And honestly, that’s going to take some effort. Although, Dynamics Digital SEO Agency out there specializes in SEO practices that will make it easier for you to improve your online traffic. 

I mean, have you seen your weblogs lately? They’re empty. Really empty. Las Vegas convention for virgin strippers empty. Annual MENSA club meeting for cast members of Jersey Shore empty.

Tip 2:

Speaking of weblogs, how about parsing yours every once in a while. Too hard? Too complicated? Really? Don’t know what you’re looking at or for? They’ve got the software for that.

To use it, all you have to do is click a link and stare at the screen for a while. But, not with that same blank look you get when a customer walks in and orders a side salad instead of french fries and you forgot which button to push for substitutions.

It’s really not much tougher than that, Tools like Google Analytics spoon feed you everything you need to know (and force-feed you a bucket full of stuff you don’t.) Get familiar with a software package that can track and help interpret your weblogs. It’ll pay off.

Tip 3:

Learn the lingo. Do you know what PR stands for? Do you know why it’s important? Know anything about how it’s calculated? What about links and backlinks? Do you understand ‘DoFollow’ and ‘NoFollow’ and why those eight little letters, though similar, are a world of difference apart?

You didn’t seriously think you were going to climb the fence, wander into SEO country and expect to do really well without learning a little bit of the language, did you? Get a cheat sheet, write it on your hand or train a gorilla to use sign language and signal it to you.

Tip 4:

Read more. At least you’re getting this one right. That’s a start. Yay for you. Your mom would be proud. (But your dad still thinks you’re a loser.)

Try reading something other than your third-grade sweetheart’s Facebook status updates for a change. So her fake crops are growing and she wants to give you some. Who cares? You’re not special. I heard she gives it away to everyone.

Even if you have to fake an interest in boring topics like SEO, do it. Do it long enough and you’ll start to enjoy it. (Like eating Brussel sprouts or dating a chubby girl.)

Finally, essentially, in conclusion, that said and on a final note, I’d like to close with a brief summarization that restates the main theme of this list . . .

Do you want traffic? It’s out there . . . waiting for you. Get up and go get it!